A letter from Joseph to his Mother

 

Dear Mom,

We are still in Bethlehem—Mary and I and little Jesus.

There are a lot of things I have not been able to talk to you about but I’m not sure you would have believed me anyway.  I want to share those things with you now and I hope you understand.

Mom, you know I have always loved Mary.  In fact, you and dad use to tease me about her when she was still a young girl.  I remember playing with her and her brothers on our street even though I was older than them.  I remember the dinners we would have together as families.  It was always fun to share times with each other’s families.

Just over a year ago was one of the hardest days in my life.  It was when I was 20 and Mary was about 15 and we were already betrothed and signed the marriage agreement at our engagement.  At the same time, Mary left abruptly to visit her cousin Elizabeth in Judea.  She was gone for three months.  When she got back, people were asking if she was pregnant.

I heard all those rumors and it was hard for me.  So one day I finally asked her, “Mary are you going to have a baby?”  Her brown eyes meet mine and she nodded yes?

I really did not know what to say but I finally muttered, “Who”?

Mom, Mary and I had never acted improperly—even after we were engaged. I did not know what to think. 

Mary in her quiet sweet way said to me, “Joseph, there is no way I can explain. You would not understand. But I want you to know that I have never cared for or loved anyone but you.”  She got up and took my hands into hers and kissed them both and started home.  She must have been dying inside, I know I was.

The rest of that day I stumbled through my chores, it is a wonder I did not hurt myself in the shop.  I was angry and my thoughts whirled around fast in my head. I finally decided the best thing to do was to end the marriage contract with a quiet divorce.  I loved her too much to make a public scene.

I could not talk to you or anyone for that matter.  When I went to bed that night I was very restless.  I kept hearing Mary’s voice in my head, “I never cared for anyone but you”.  I wish I could believe her!

I finally drifted off to sleep and Mom you will not believe what happened. I had a dream and an angel visited me in the dream.  The angel said, “Joseph, do not afraid to marry Mary.  Her pregnancy is Spirit-conceived. God’s Holy Spirit has made her pregnant.  She will have a son and when she does you, Joseph, will name him Jesus, meaning God Saves, because he will save his people from their sins.”  I remember that angel as if it were yesterday.  It was as if the angel held my shoulders with his huge hands and his gaze pierced deep within me.

When I woke up, I thought, “This is the answer”. The angel has given me the reason. I got up dressed quietly so I would not awake you and I went outside for a walk.  I must have walked for miles in the moonlight. Stars pricked the sky with light and there was a warm breeze blowing on my face.

I even sang to the Lord, Mom.  I know yes me singing. I could not contain my joy and I told God I would take Mary and care for her. I told Him I would watch over her and the child and I would always be there for her no matter what anyone said.

As the sun was coming up and I got close to home, I could see you outside and you were surprised to see me, remember? I said, “Mom, sit down there is something I need to tell you.”  You sat down on that big rock and I said, “Mom, I am going to bring Mary home as my wife.  Could you help make a place for her things?”

You were silent for a long time.  Then you said, “You do know what they are saying, don’t you son?”  Your eyes were brimming with tears.  “Yes, Mom, I know”.

Your voice started to rise as you said, “If your father were still alive, he’d have some words like, “I’ll tell you, going about like that before you are married. Disgracing the family and all. You and Mary should be ashamed of yourselves”!

I knew you would never believe me if I’d tried to explain, so I just did not. Unless the angel had spoken to you personally I knew you would not understand and would have laughed at me.

I remember saying, “Mom this is the right thing to do”.  Then I said in a little huff, “When she comes I do not want one word uttered to her about this.  She is your daughter in law and you will respect her.  She’ll need your help to bear the neighbors’ wagging tongues.”

Mom, you did not deserve that and when you got up to walk away, I knew you were angry with me. But when I said, “I need you”. You took my hand, got to your feet, but the fire was gone from your eyes.

“You can count on me Joseph”, you said as you gave me a big hug. I knew you meant it and I never heard another word. A new bride could not have hoped for a better mother in law than you those next few months.

After I left you, I went to Mary’s house. I knocked on the door and her mother came to the door but I could tell she was angry.  She finally loudly said, “It’s Joseph!” almost spitting my name out as she said it.

Mary came to the door and I could tell she had been crying.  She looked afraid.  I took her hand and I said, “Pack your things, Mary.” As gently as I could say it I said, “I’m taking you home to be my wife”.

“Joseph” she said.  She hugged me really tight.  I could see her eyes become brighter with the news.

I told her what I had been planning.  “We’ll go to Rabbi Ben-Ezer’s house this week and have him perform the ceremony”.  Mary was shuddering as she sobbed quietly.

“Mary”, I said.  I could feel myself speaking more boldly, “No matter what anyone says about you, I’m proud you’re going to be my wife.  I’m going to take good care of you, I have promised God that.”

She looked up at me questioning me with her eyes. I said, “Mary I had a dream last night, and the angel told me, I know”.  The fear was gone and she was radiant as we turned away from the house and began to walk up the hill.

Mom, I think her mother must have been listening because she came running out in the yard, “Wait” she called. Tears were streaming down her cheeks.  She said, “I’ll get your Father, we are going to have a wedding”.

So that how it was, Mom.  I will have to share all the amazing things that have happened since we arrived in Bethlehem.  You won’t believe all those things to, but it has been amazing to be part of God’s plan for the world.

I will write again soon.

Love, Joseph

 

 

 

Can you SEE me now?

It seems with my recent cataract surgeries my focus has been on “seeing clearly”.

This past July on a Wednesday afternoon all of a sudden I begin to not see clearly out of my right eye.  I could not imagine what had happen so the next morning I went to the eye doctor and he said, “That cataract is ready to come off”!

I was shocked and said, “What cataract”?  He said he told me when I was there in Feb. but I guess I had “selective hearing” because I don’t remember him saying anything about that!

It took me 3 weeks to get an appointment in Chattanooga and they confirmed that I did have a cataract in my right eye and my left eye!  I told the doctor I could not tell I had one in my left eye, to which she replied, you will notice it more when we get the right eye fixed.  I told her I felt like I fit the description of “blind in one eye and can’t see out of the other!”  She said "pretty much"!

It was another month before I got to have the surgery. The right eye was first and then two weeks the other one would be done. I had cloudy vision during the entire time. It was very frustrating and was tiring also!  Even though I dreaded the surgery, I was ready to see again.

On the afternoon of the surgery, my vision was still blurry because of all the drops plus the swelling of the eye ball.    I was thinking, “This is not a lot better”.  However, the next morning when I got up and turned on the TV, I could not believe how different it was!  I thought “did I get a new TV over night”. The most amazing thing to me was the sharpness of color!  And after I had the second surgery it was even more amazing! The leaves look greener; the rooms in my house look different and at work the lights are brighter.  When I went for my follow up exam I discovered I have 20-20 vision, the astigmatism was removed and I don’t have to wear glasses for driving.  I’ve worn glasses since I was 16 for driving.  I still have to have those pesky reading glasses!

As I have been going through this experience I have thought often of the story in the Bible found in Mark 8:22-26.

“Some people brought a sightless man and begged Jesus to give him a healing touch. Taking him by the hand, he led him out of the village. He put spit in the man’s eyes, laid hands on him, and asked, “Do you see anything?”

^24-26 He looked up. “I see men. They look like walking trees.” So Jesus laid hands on his eyes again. The man looked hard and realized that he had recovered perfect sight; saw everything in bright, twenty-twenty focus.”    The Message

During this time of “not seeing clearly” I have been thinking about what else I am not seeing clearly in my life.   As I read this scripture I begin to think: Do I need a “Second Touch” from Jesus to help me see clearly other things in my life.

As I continued this journey through the eyes of this scripture I focused on not just my physical sight which now had been restored but my entire journey.  In my spiritual journey I begin to examine if things appeared hazy for example: What does the future hold for me? When difficult times come what I am suppose to seeing? When I have more questions about life than answers, what should I be seeing? Have I been being obedient in following and accepting the things God has placed in my life?

I have to admit that sometimes the life journey becomes hazy and I have contributed to that problem because I have been seeing things in my own eyes rather than looking at life from God’s eyes.  When I try to figure things out or try to fix things I think is wrong, I do have hazy vision.  When I stop and ask for the “second touch” then I begin to see things in a different light. Sometimes it is not until time has passed and I look back to realize how things worked out for the best. It took the challenging times to bring clarity and meaning for the journey.

How do we avoid seeing things as “blurry trees” as the man in the scripture saw?  Perhaps we need to have the “second touch”.  We need to say to God, “I’ve let my vision become blurry, please give me the discernment to look beyond myself and see everything through your eyes.

Even when it seems our vision is still blurry, we can have the confidence to step through the haziness and trust our future is secure in God’s hands?

What seems unclear for you at the moment?  Seek God’s wisdom for your journey through His eyes?

What Time Is It?

I find myself asking that question the last couple of weeks because the battery on my watch is dead.  I have a Seiko watch which was a gift, but it is rather expensive to replace the battery.  So I have not had it replaced at this time.

So I find myself looking at my arm to remember that I don’t have a watch on! So the next question is often, “what time is it”!  I have a clock on my computer and my phone, however, I seem to not be at my desk or have my phone when I need to know the time!

We have a 3 year old in our CLC center who has recently been asking “what time is it?”  One of the teachers’s asked him if he had somewhere he needed to be and he said, “yes, what time is it”!  He had a birthday coming up and his grandmother asked him what he wanted her to buy for his birthday.  He replied, “A clock”! I guess it does not matter that he does not know how to tell time! 

The statement “what time is it” also leads me to think literally about things in my journey of life and pause to wonder, “what time is it really”.  Not what time is on the clock, but the time I spend in my journey of life.  What do I give myself to in the “time department?”

Everyone has 24 hours in a day, yet that never seems to be enough to get everything done that needs to be done.  As I stop and reflect on where my time goes, I have to admit some of it is “wasted” on things that are not really important.

When I think of “what time is it” I am reminded of how precious time really is and that using it wisely is an important part of my journey.  There are many books written about time management.  I think my problem is not so much time management but the need to “evaluate” how I spend my time.  There is a difference.

Some things I think are important to work on include:

1.    There is not a need to get caught up in other people’s drama and waste my time on things that in the end does not really affect me.

2.    I do not have to attend every argument that I am invited too.

3.    Learn to recognize that other people’s opinion does not have to become my reality.

4.    The statement “stupidity is wasting your time on people you don’t even care about” is a daily reminder that being involved with people who I do love and care about deserves more time than wasting time on those people.

5.    If I do not take care of myself, then I will not be able to help take care of others.

6.    Learn to determine what is really important and give priority for those things.  Doing this will bring order and satisfaction in one’s journey.

SO WHAT TIME IS IT?

It is not just numbers on a clock, it is the value we place in our journey and how we choose to spend our time.

If just for one day what do you think would be our biggest surprise if we focus on exactly how we spend the hours in the day?

I think it is time to put into practice the six things I have already mentioned. If we do those things, I think we will really see what time it is.

 

 

A Chance Meeting or A Divine Appointment?



 
A Chance Meeting or A Divine Appointment?

 There have been times in my life when I have met someone or have been in an experience that was totally unexpected.  Often that experience leaves a lasting impression for me or introduces me to a new friends and new insight in my life.

I have often said, “What were the chances of that happening”? OR “What a small world to meet someone who (fill in the blank)”.

As I ponder these situations, I begin to discover maybe it might not have been a “chance meeting” it might in fact been a “divine appointment.”

I believe God is awesome and He lives with us each day and guides us if we will only have the discernment to listen.  I believe He is weaving a tapestry of goodness and kindness of which we are a thread to add color and meaning.  He knows the plans He has for my life as I pick and choose where I go each day.  As I make my schedule, He has some inked-in divine appointments for me to play a part.

I find it exciting that He places various people He wants me to show compassion, empathy and encouragement in the circumstances I encounter.  It also reminds me I need to be aware of my circumstances and not be so busy to miss the opportunities God has given me.  I recognize that I need discernment to recognize His divine appointments and not miss out on the blessings he has for me.

So how do I arrive at that discernment? Perhaps I need to let go of myself and simply be all He has created me to be.  I think a good place to start would to be recognizing His love for me and how I am to love others. 

As I ponder this concept I am reminded of some ways that I may do those things:

·       When others are not kind, show kindness

·       When others are impatient, show patience

·       When others are discouraging, encourage

·       When others are selfish, share what I have

·       When others ignore someone, notice them, smile  and say hello

·       When others reject, insult, betray us, show acceptance, love and forgiveness

 We may never know when those simple “divine appointments” come to us the difference it will make in our lives as well as the lives of others.

So as we think of today and what comes our way, let’s pray for the discernment to see those “divine appointments” God may place in our journey.

 


There have been times in my life when I have met someone or have been in an experience that was totally unexpected.  Often that experience leaves a lasting impression for me or introduces me to a new friends and new insight in my life.
 
I have often said, “What were the chances of that happening”? OR “What a small world to meet someone who (fill in the blank)”.

As I ponder these situations, I begin to discover maybe it might not have been a “chance meeting” it might in fact been a “divine appointment.”

I believe God is awesome and He lives with us each day and guides us if we will only have the discernment to listen.  I believe He is weaving a tapestry of goodness and kindness of which we are a thread to add color and meaning.  He knows the plans He has for my life as I pick and choose where I go each day.  As I make my schedule, He has some inked-in divine appointments for me to play a part.

I find it exciting that He places various people He wants me to show compassion, empathy and encouragement in the circumstances I encounter.  It also reminds me I need to be aware of my circumstances and not be so busy to miss the opportunities God has given me.  I recognize that I need discernment to recognize His divine appointments and not miss out on the blessings he has for me.

So how do I arrive at that discernment? Perhaps I need to let go of myself and simply be all He has created me to be.  I think a good place to start would to be recognizing His love for me and how I am to love others. 

As I ponder this concept I am reminded of some ways that I may do those things:

·       When others are not kind, show kindness

·       When others are impatient, show patience

·       When others are discouraging, encourage

·       When others are selfish, share what I have

·       When others ignore someone, notice them, smile  and say hello

·       When others reject, insult, betray us, show acceptance, love and forgiveness

 We may never know when those simple “divine appointments” come to us the difference it will make in our lives as well as the lives of others.
 
So as we think of today and what comes our way, let’s pray for the discernment to see those “divine appointments” God may place in our journey.

 

Had You Rather Be Right Or Be Kind?

As adults it seems we are not treating each other well these days. Everyone is angry at something or someone.  We are quick to judge and proclaim “I am right and if you don’t agree then you are wrong”. Often that attitude leads to unkind treatment of people and harsh words.

I feel it is so unfortunate that both inside and outside the church, it seems our dislikes and intolerance for people who don’t think or believe the same things we do is increasing and our ability to get along with one another is decreasing in a very dramatic way.

I am reminded of a statement my dad used when talking about how to treat others.  He would say, “Had you rather be right or be kind”?  My dad demonstrated to me it was more important to be kind and I try to practice that in my relationships with people.

In our society today it seems there has developed a sense of “entitlement”.  It is often quoted as 5^th amendment right.  Really? The 5^th amendment does not give anyone the right to be unkind, exclusive or bash people who do not agree with their beliefs or opinions. 

It is true everyone has their right to stand up for their own beliefs. People should support whatever causes they feel best express those beliefs.  However, when did it become acceptable to be so ugly and mean spirited to others who do not agree with those beliefs?

I wonder if that is why people are so turned off to church and attendance has continued to decrease in recent years.  When we read about Jesus’ ministry in the New Testament we find he was accepting of everyone and often reminded the “church leaders” that their rule keeping and finger pointing was not the way God intended for others to be treated.

If I had to summarize what I think we should all do to follow Jesus’ teaching in our world today it would be to love others and be kind.  Perhaps if we spend more time praying for all those we tend to be unkind to we would see a difference in our country.  But more importantly we would see a difference in our own lives.  

My personal goal is to be a person who recognizes everyone is important, everyone needs love, everyone has value and that we do not all have to share the same beliefs to be able to love one another.

So had your rather be right or be kind?  The decision is up to you.

What does loving others really mean?  Maybe we should examine what real love means.  I believe this is a good place to start:

Love never gives up.
   Love cares more for others than for self.
   Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
   Love doesn't strut,
   Doesn't have a swelled head,
   Doesn't force itself on others,
   Isn't always "me first,"
   Doesn't fly off the handle,
   Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
   Doesn't revel when others grovel,
   Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
   Puts up with anything,
   Trusts God always,
   Always looks for the best,
   Never looks back,
   But keeps going to the end.

 (1 Cor. 13)

Perseverance

Perseverance

My dad use to say, “All good things come to those who wait”.  He probably said that to me more than any of my sisters because I tended to want something and want it “now”.  I admit I am not good at the “waiting” game.  However, I do feel as I have aged I have developed a little perseverance but I still have a long way to go in the “waiting” game of life.

I recall the story of Harlan Sanders better recognized as Colonel Sanders.

When he was 63 years old he had every right to feel like he was a victim but he became a victor instead.  He owned a restaurant-motel-service station business which he had built up over the years.  He was offered nearly $200,000 cash for the business, but he turned it down because he was not ready to retire.  Two years later, the state built a new highway which bypassed his business and within a year Harlan had lost everything.

He was 65 years old, broke, and no income other than a small monthly Social Security check to live on.  The only thing he knew how to do well was cook chicken.  He decided that maybe he could sale that knowledge to someone else. So he packed up his old car with a pressure cooker and his special recipe and set out to sell his idea to others.

It was a tough road for him and he often slept in his car because he did not have enough money for a hotel.  Restaurant after restaurant turned him down.  He suffered over 300 rejections before someone believed in his dream. 

A few years later he opened the first of what would become a very successful restaurant chain known as “Kentucky Fried Chicken”. 

Harlan was quoted as saying, “Never quit at the age of 64, my success came when I was 65”.

It often seems me to perseverance is a quality that many of us need to develop in this life journey.  We tend to live in a world that wants everything now rather than later.  We do not like to wait!

Just think of the “fast food” industry.  They first put in a “drive-thru” which was supposed to be faster for you to be on your way.  Then the “first and second” window idea was introduced so that you could pay at one and get your food at the second so you could be on your way even faster.  Now some places have two lanes with speakers so people do not have to wait as long to place the order.

In fact, just about everything has a “drive thru” these days because we are so busy we don’t want to have take the time to actually go in a business. When I lived in Georgia, there was even a drive thru for you to purchase your car tag! No waiting in long lines which I loved. 

I admit I like drive through for pick up.  I use the drive thru bank, drive thru drug store, drive thru restaurants or those who will bring it to you car.

I have no idea what the inside of many of these places look like because I don’t ever go inside!  

So what does that say about our ability to persevere?  As for me I could say I do not like to have to “wait” very long. 

This brings me back to the statement of my dad, “all good things come to those who wait”.  My dad was a great encourager and always made you feel like you could accomplish anything if you tried long enough or in other words you need to persevere.  One of my memories as a child is a piano recital in which I had practiced many hours to be ready to perform.  As I was playing at the recital I forgot part of the piece.  I stopped and began at the beginning and when I got to that same place I could not remember.  I did this two times and then finally just got up and walked away.  I was embarrassed and wanted to run out of the building. 

After the recital my dad said, “I think you played the part you remembered the best I’ve ever heard you play”.  He told me to always remember that to try and fail is better than to not ever try at all.  An important lesson I learned from him is that perseverance is an important quality to develop in life. 

Oliver Goldsmith said, “Success consists of getting up just one more time than you fail.”  It seems “faster” or “now” is not a quality of life that always brings success.

There have been times in the “waiting” period that I have not practiced perseverance.  I have allowed my journey to be clouded with doubt, resentment, feeling of being the “victim” and felt miss-treated.

So as I ponder the word perseverance it makes me realize that I have to learn that never quitting, never giving up and just putting one foot in front of the other leads to many successful roads. 

I invite you to join me in pondering this quote: “Don’t be discouraged. It’s often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock”.

I offer this as an encouragement to all of us to keep working on developing perseverance so our lives will be successful, Remember the next time you eat KFC chicken: Colonel Sanders was 65, broke and had 300 rejections before someone believed in him and his idea. 

Integrity

Integrity

The events in our world in recent days have brought me to a place of thinking, "why do people act like they do, say what they say, and basically have very little concern for anyone but themselves.  Those thoughts led me to begin thinking about Integrity and what it means in our world today.

What words come to your mind when you hear the word: Integrity?

Words that are often used to define Integrity include: Honesty, Faithfulness, Sincerity, Truth, and Honor.

So how does one become a person of Integrity?

For me it begins with coming to an understanding of who you are as a person and what values are important in your life.  How do you decide those values?

One must reconcile their values with what is important to them, what brings value to their life, and how they practice those values in their own life.

People develop those values with many different influences in their lives. Values may be based on their family traditions, spiritual truths, moral issues, political issues, society influences, and discovering who they are and what purpose they have in life.

I believe true Integrity comes from inside a person to their daily actions in their life journey.

C.S. Lewis defined integrity,

“Doing the right thing even when no one is watching”

Another definition I think defines integrity for me is:

       “Deciding to integrate my values into my daily actions”

For me being a person of integrity means:

      “You can count on me, I will keep my word and I will be true.”

Another way of saying that is:

      “I’m not for sale at any price”.

So how do we practice integrity in our lives?  The key points for me are:

• Not to be easily influenced by others.  You will not recant your principles based on what someone else tries to get you to do.
• Not to comprise your convictions even if it means being left out of a group.
• Not willing to compromise your consistent character even if circumstances would make it easy and the potential for gain is great

INTEGRITY DEFICIT DISORDER

I believe that in our society we suffer an integrity deficit disorder.  I believe this comes from creating an environment of influencing people to think outside in instead of inside out.

The world in which we live places so much attention on being popular, glamorous, being cool, plotting to get what you want, and power plays at any cost creates “outside” thinking.

So why do we wonder where the sense of entitlement comes from in our society?  Consistently focusing on what is outside for material possession and success does not lead to becoming a person of integrity.  It leads to being a person who will play any game or do whatever it takes to get what they perceive to be successful.

It leads a person to be unpredictable, making decisions depending on the day of the week, the way they feel, or who ever they talked to last and what others want them to do which they perceive will get them ahead or be popular.

How do we over come this disorder?  Each person has a personal responsibility to become a person of integrity and encourage other people to do the same.

Proverbs 10:9 “People with integrity walk safely but those who follow crooked paths will slip and fall”.  The words of wisdom from Proverbs remind us why it is important to know who you are, determine your principles for your life and then practice them.

My goal for life is live consistently with my principles or in other words,

“I’m the same everywhere either public or private and my word is my bond.”

A person of Integrity would be one who practices what they believe, speak honestly, speak with love and show kindness.

Ponder on these thoughts and find encouragement to continue to be a person of integrity!